The Department of Philosophy and Religious Studies at the University of [Somewhere You Really Don't Want to Live, Believe Me] invites applications for a one-year Academic Staff position (Lecturer, not tenure track) in Philosophy for 2007-2008 (beginning August 27th). This is a temporary position to teach nine course sections. ... Areas of specialization and competence are open. An ABD in philosophy is required, a Ph.D. and teaching experience are preferred. A complete application packet (consisting of a letter of application, curriculum vita, three recent letters of recommendation, and copies of all undergraduate and graduate transcripts) should be sent to [bla bla bla bla....]
Notice that this is a position to teach NINE FUCKING COURSES. Nine. Is that even humanly possible? I have my doubts. It's certainly not possible to teach that many courses well.
Even if you're doubling up on some preps, there are only so many damn hours in the day. Good luck getting out of there alive, poor sad bastard desperate ABD who takes this one.
[Moment of silence.]
In other news, check out what the "complete application packet" consists of. All the usual stuff--CV, letters of recommendation, (though notice they don't even pretend to be interested in the candidate's research: there's no request for a writing sample on there)--and COPIES OF ALL UNDERGRADUATE AND GRADUATE TRANSCRIPTS. Wow. Awesome. It's bad enough that a lot of places want grad transcripts. But undergrad? WTF? Way to broadcast your insecurity in judging your colleagues' philosophical ability, search committee. Good work.
The only thing to do is hope they get the candidate they deserve, really.